Sunday, December 27, 2009

Kujichagulia

Self-determination. I know I have that somewhere but sometimes by the end of the day I am totally unequivocally wiped out and have no determination to put myself in effect. My brain barely functions but I digress. I discovered after and an intensely emotional conversation with my husband that I need to let a lot guy. I have been my whole family has been a victim to my Montessori approach to parenting. The key problem is that I am still trying to figure out what it all means and not only how to apply it to my families life and the families of my school but also how well the theories fit in with our current times. I have been rigid in many areas and created a hard road parenting making it sometimes/often not fun. Always having to explain your style having people not understand you and eventually write you and your children off (well, that hasn't happened but I feel it coming). Actually, it almost happened with a great grandparent but I consider the less we see of her no great loss (terrible I know).
I don't know where I am going from here but I feel prepared (not really) to bend and possible break a few rules of my training just to have a feeling of ease in my/our home.

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